All I want is one squirt
By SHAWNA MCCOY
Blast San Francisco Bureau
Gourmet coffee drinkers, I apologize. I like the flavored coffee.
Unfortunately for me, most serious coffee houses don't serve it, so I'm
forced to go for the syrup. You know there's all types of flavors
hazelnut, almond, chocolate. But I like it subtle, not overbearing. Too
much syrup, too many squirts, and my coffee is doomed. Might as well just
pour it all out.
In my quest for lightly syruped coffee that's at least 50 visits to
coffee houses I have come up disappointed.
Even when I say, "just one shot of hazelnut please," or, "I only want a
teeny bit of hazelnut syrup," it never fails, the coffee house employee
proceeds to pump fast and plenty on the syrup dispenser.
I stand there shocked, baffled, betrayed.
One time I told the woman, "pour it out, I don't want that much." She gave
me this look.
"Hey fuck you. I told you what I wanted." That's what I almost told her.
Another time I couldn't help myself from yelling, "Stop, stop that's
enough!" as he continued to pump.
Which begs the question, if they're not listening what are they doing?
Thinking of their lives outside of work. Maybe of a good-looking co-worker.
They're not thinking of me. Me, the person that's paying the $1.25. They
obviously didn't get trained at McDonalds.
LISTEN TO THE CUSTOMER. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
Unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be the attitude in many places,
nowadays, not only coffee houses.
I've been to fast food restaurants where the person taking my order never
once looks me in the face. Places where cashiers continue talking on the
phone to their friends, or family, or whomever, even after they see me
standing there to purchase something.
So at a time when we are expected to tip on a $1.25 cup of java, I should
get coffee the way I like it.
Even though it is a simple request. One squirt.
I advocate people learn from the McDonalds school of customer service. It's
a good philosophy. Go down to the local McDonalds and ask to see their
training manual on customer service. Customers should be treated with
respect. We are always right. And we should be listened to. And, don't
I expect to be treated that way. I'm paying for my squirt. I'm actually
leaving the coffee house ahead by asking for less.
So please, it's simple, just one squirt.